Feeling left behind

Good Monday to All!

Sorry that this is late, I debated about even writing anything today. I have been trying not to feel down and to not feel like once again I am on the sidelines of my life. I want to work out and get back on my path of getting into a healthy lifestyle routine but this back stuff is just driving me up the wall.  I came to the conclusion that if I don't continue in trying to write and stay positive I will be letting this injury win and this could lead to bad habits/decisions in health that I let defeat me for so long.

I went to the doctor again for a follow up and and he prescribed some therapy to alleviate some pain areas and hopefully speed up the process. Upon further conversation he reiterated what my trainer, Obi-wan Kelsey, and I discussed about no weights or exercise at the gym until the tension and pain are gone however swimming would be an acceptable alternative so I will try that this week and hopefully things will progress better.

There is always a way to overcome the challenges we have in life it is just about finding the way to get there and finding my path.


Check out this video out for inspiration because if this gentleman can get healthy when dealing with so many issues, there must be some form of an answer for me.



This man clearly is not me and I don't ever see myself doing yoga, it is just not for me, but how can you not feel inspired seeing his story!

Friday Rants and Raves - April 15

No Rants or Raves today, just trying to focus on getting healthy and not let my frustration get the better of me!

I will try to be back next Friday for follow up on how my back and health are doing. 

Weigh In Wednesday - April 13

Weigh in Wednesday for April 13th

I must say with the action (or little there of) that i have seen lately due to my back I am feeling the blahs about this weigh in. Sure it would be nice to know where I am at but I don't have too much faith in losing any and am sure I am around that same or plus a few pounds. 

Who knows though, maybe this break has given my body time to catch up with my work ethic and hustle and has now become accustomed to the diet and lesser extent the routine of healthier living thus my body has responded well and at very least maintained or possibly lost a pound (there is always hope no matter how limited of a chance!).

This weekend I brought out my exercise/yoga ball and did some stretching on it trying to keep the muscles loose and active by doing some crunches. I plan to bring this more into my daily routine as well before leaving the house in the morning. Stretching and warming up is important no matter your size and weight as it helps prevent injuries and gets the blood flowing; but when you are dealing with muscle issues from an injury it is even more so imperative to keep the muscles loose and ready, working out the aches and pains and spasms and trying to not let the muscles seize up. 

I am still not back at the gym and it is frustrating. I feel almost 80% in the morning but by the time noon rolls around my back is all f#@&y and my headaches are just pounding away. I just want to be back to normal and back kicking butt at the gym! I am not going to let this bring me down though! I will get through it but I will listen to what my body says too, i will not do anything to jeopradize my health or my progress long term for getting fit and healthy.

SW:  447

LW:   n/a

TW: 431

+ / -  +5

LTD  -16

God damn it I want this damn injured feeling to go away!!!!

Set backs and Perseverance

Good morning to all, I hope you have a fantastic Monday and a great week!

This last week I had a bit of a setback and I am okay with it. I was in a minor car accident, got hit from behind when at a stop light; I am okay other than that I was a bit sore for a few days and still have some tightness in my shoulders and back. The other driver was distracted, said she dropped something and whammo.., she is okay too, her car took the brunt of the impact, crumpled the hood of her car. while mine just had some minor bumper damage. Alas everything is okay because these are minor things that can be fixed, that is after all what insurance is for.

After this happened I stopped going to the gym this week, I ached too much and have worried about making things worse. I have been doing stretching and trying to loosen my back up and am looking at easing my way back into the gym, taking it easy along the way.

I have missed going to the gym, I have felt guilty about it the whole time but at same time I don't want to ruin the progress I have made so far. Thinking of this makes me realize how much I have changed in the last 3+ months.

At times before this year I questioned it all, where I am where I am going and how I was getting there. This year I have pushed through my self doubts and though I have struggled I have come a long way now. I believe in the process and where I am going, there may be times of frustration but the frustration is only temporary when looking at the bigger picture. I am in this for the long haul, and I will not rush into it.

The facts are this:
I have lost over 20 pounds so far
I have lost inches in the right areas
I am now comfortable going to the gym
I am also comfortable to work out with people around
I can now spend 90 mins to 2 hours at gym
I have increased my cardio on treadmill from a 2.5 to 2.8 for 60 mins straight


I know I am always talking about the mentality of losing weight and having to be mentally in the right place and seeing the facts for what they are instead of making up shit in my head and having doubt. I will not let this accident and setback control or define me. I will be back at it in full (hopefully) this week and back on my way to this journey of finding me.

Here is a link for what to do and not do after being in an accident:
TOP TEN THINGS THAT CAN HELP YOU HEAL AFTER AN ACCIDENT

Friday's Rants and Raves - Weightloss or Fat Loss?

Happy Friday to all!

Thank goodness the weekend is here! 

Since my accident I have not been to the gym, though I may go this weekend and go slow, none the less here is my thoughts i have had over the last little while:

The last week or so I have been researching and thinking about my frustration with the weight-loss and where I am erring. and as usual it is my thought process; but alas I think I have a grip on it now! I have been focusing too much on the weight loss and not the fat loss. I had heard the term "It is not about weight-loss but fat loss that we must focus on" and I always thought what the hell is the difference? If I lose weight am I not losing fat? 

The answer to that is yes* (note the asterix). 

Of course I am losing weight but if I focus more on the fat loss it would mean hopefully that I am building more muscle and losing inches, and right now that is very important to me. Well I guess it is all important in the end but that is just it though, in the end the weight will come off it is just logic and science. I am putting in the effort at the gym, eating right (99% of the time anyways) and just doing what is needed to get to where I want to go. 

As I say so many times this journey is 75% about me getting my brain focused properly; relieving myself of the negatives and building myself up with positive thoughts and accurate facts. By setting up my brain for success all other aspects will fall in place. 

Nothing is overnight especially in this journey and I was going through my frustration thinking what is wrong with me? Why am I not losing weight? then i looked in the mirror and noticed that I believe my stomach is flatter. I have finally bought a flexible measuring tape and will soon take my measurements so I have a better point of reference to go with.  (FYI you can get a flexible measuring tape at Walmart in the sewing and crafts section; I paid $2.00 CND for it.)

I hope none of you give up when your frustrated, but rather keep searching for answers and hopefully take my struggles to heart and know that you can also over come this! if I can do it, and I will, then you can as well.

Wednesday Weigh In Day April 6

Sorry everyone for the delay on this; I was in a  car accident on Tuesday and have been stiff and sore which is why the delay on posting this.  I wrote this prior to Wednesday  so it does not reflect my current status.

Happy Wednesday to you all!

Lets get crackin'...

So this last week I had once again had no change in my weight, but this time instead of being frustrated and giving up temporarily like I have done in the past, this time I trucked on through and continued going to the gym and keeping my regular routine. Don't get me wrong I am still frustrated but I am trying to take my frustration out at the gym instead. I know this is a marathon and not the 100 yard dash, slow and steady wins this race. I am feeling skinnier, I notice some clothes are looser than they were before so no matter what the scale says I am getting desired results in one way or the other. 

I will not let the scale define me or dictate what my success is. I briefly thought that I would weigh in once a month but decided against it, I just won't rely on the results as much. Bottom line I am feeling healthier, stronger and feeling like I am making a difference in my own life and in the end is that not the goal? The scale is just a number but my work ethic and consistency in continuing to try and lose this weight is what is most important. 

This week I have just been determined to not let a number cause a set back. What I do plan to do is go in depth of what i am eating and figure out what is going on. I know that the result is not equating to the effort put in. In life we all have road bumps it is how we push through these bumps that will define us. I am choosing to push harder through this and use it as motivation, I will not let my fat self win. I will not let bad habits continue, I will not let my health be defined by lack of effort.

I am working hard at getting my brain set in the right place so I can carry through this. Weightloss is about having your mind on point with emotions, with mentality, with motivation, with reasoning and with conviction, if your mind is not in the right path then you will find excuses for why you will fail, you will seek self-defeating thoughts whether you know it or not. You have trained your brain for so long giving yourself excuses as to why something should not be done or why you cant achieve something. You have done that for so long you actually start to believe it, so now you must question everything and retrain the brain. I talked about this before I know but please know this is not a one time deal; I must continue over and over again questioning everything until I am in the right mindset and that my reactions are automatic and I can recognize the successes I have had without thinking about it. Right now I have to remind myself that I have had success because I don't always physically see it. 

This is all a process, I am working at creating new healthy living habits and changing things and creating these habits take time so I can't let a scale's number be true judgement of where I am at. 

SW 447

LW 426

TW  n/a

+/-    n/a

LTD -21

Monday Morning Recap March 28 to April 3rd - In Recovery

Happy Monday to everyone! 

This last week was good but a wee bit painful too! I really tried pushing my limits at the gym by putting in more time on weights and the tread mill and by doing this I noticed I am having a lot more fatigue physically and mentally.  My muscles have definitely been feeling the burn but I feel good just tired.

I am looking into what is good for recovery so I don't feel so rundown afterwards. As the science behind it all is still relatively new to me it takes time to find what is right for me and my body and health. I am one of those people if I take an interest in something I need to know all the facts and information behind it.


Here is a great article on muscle recovery:

http://www.livestrong.com/article/506357-feeling-tired-the-day-after-a-workout/

It is always important to find out the reasoning and how to deal with any issue or speed bump we come across. the internet is a wide world and there is loads of information for us to ingest, there is no excuse for not finding the answers you seek.

Have a great week everyone and see you Wednesday for weigh in day!

PS. - I am very proud of my brother in law - Kevin who has joined the same gym as Tabitha and I; now if I can only convince them both to go in at 4 am like me....

Friday's Rants and Rambles: Baggy Clothes

Happy Friday to all of you!

I might be crazy but I am feeling like I might actually be having baggier clothes than normal. Perhaps despite me fighting the scales for the last few weeks (or month) I do feel like my clothes are fitting a bit better. Not as tight in some spots and baggier in others. I like this feeling as it gives me a glimmer of hope of what will be one day. 

I don't really see it yet, however, I know it will come in time. Fact is I have had over 240 pounds I am wanting to lose and while I may have only lost 5% so far and have a long way to go I have been very proud of my journey so far and to even feel that my clothes might be a bit looser than it was is a tremendous feeling!

Last year I bought some new pants but it was late spring early summer and so I put them in a drawer and somewhat forgot about them until the fall. When fall came I took the pants out and tried to put them on.. nope wasn't happening, they were too small. couldn't even pull them up properly. This last Saturday though I tried them on just to see where I was at, and because my work pants got a rip right up the leg from the cuff to my knee, it damn near looked like bell bottoms! So when I tried on the pants I was expecting failure again; I am proud to say that I got them on all the way up albeit not to a point where I would wear them in public for fear of something popping or ripping and ain't nobody got time for that!

You have no idea how big of a deal that is for me especially when living in a fairly small town that specializes in not selling clothes for "fluffy" people such as myself.

Here is a great article about noticing the weight loss:

http://www.livestrong.com/article/445164-how-long-does-it-take-to-start-to-notice-weight-loss/

Have a great week peeps!

Remember to start strong and finish strong on your journey!