Well here we are 7 months from the accident and I am still recovering from my Post Concussive Syndrome (PCS). I never would have thought that my accident would have caused so many issues in my life and health. I feel for those with this devastating diagnosis.
I am very thankful for my physio-therapist who has helped me so much in getting back to somewhat of normalcy. Though I must say i was cursing her my first few visits as she put my neck and head through the ringer as she worked on my neck. There were many days where I had serious doubts about my health and life and where I would end up if i didn't get better soon.
Irritability. Sadness/Depression. Fogginess. Dizziness. Migraines. Pressure in the Head. Confusion. Sensitivity to Light & Noise. Blurred Vision. Just not feeling like myself. Nausea. Balance Issues. Feeling Slowed Down. Difficulty Concentrating. Difficulty Remembering. Trouble Falling Asleep. More Emotional than normal. Nervous or Anxious.
All of the above symptoms occurring on a daily basis and then some.
This journey has not been easy on me or my family; people see you and you look normal and that everything seems good but under the surface you feel like your in the middle of the ocean during a raging hurricane being torn in all directions. You hate to disappoint them but you feel lost and like you are letting them down when you put your own health above doing what others expect of you. Skipping family dinners, being holed up in bed because you cant bare to think of even standing or walking somewhere; wanting to just take a pill and wake up in a month (or six) hoping to feel better by then. not to mention the pressure of trying to pay bills based on one income and when you do return to work even in a very limited role your pay hardly pays one bill because you are only work for 2 hours a day.
I have had some highs and lows in this process from the beginning, some days I feel like I am almost back to normalcy then I will randomly have a setback that makes me worry and anxious about how long i will be suffering for and if the symptoms will ever truly go away.
Today I feel like I am on a good path and that I may be getting better, but I have felt that way before and then only to fall flat on my arse with a setback that makes me realize how frail I still am.
One day at a time, one moment at a time is all I can manage right now, thankfully the moments are coming up more often now.
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